| Part One , Chapter 10 When Levin went into the restaurant with Oblonsky , he could not help noticing a certain peculiarity of expression , as it were , a restrained radiance , about the face and whole figure of Stepan Arkadyevitch . Oblonsky took off his overcoat , and with his hat over one ear walked into the dining room , giving directions to the Tatar waiters , who were clustered about him in evening coats , bearing napkins . Bowing to right and left to the people he met , and here as everywhere joyously greeting acquaintances , he went up to the sideboard for a preliminary appetizer of fish and vodka , and said to the painted Frenchwoman decked in ribbons , lace , and ringlets , behind the counter , something so amusing that even that Frenchwoman was moved to genuine laughter . Levin for his part refrained from taking any vodka simply because he felt such a loathing of that Frenchwoman , all made up , it seemed , of false hair , poudre de riz , and vinaigre de toilette . He made haste to move away from her , as from a dirty place . His whole soul was filled with memories of Kitty , and there was a smile of triumph and happiness shining in his eyes . " This way , your excellency , please . Your excellency wo n't be disturbed here , " said a particularly pertinacious , white-headed old Tatar with immense hips and coat-tails gaping widely behind . " Walk in , your excellency , " he said to Levin ; by way of showing his respect to Stepan Arkadyevitch , being attentive to his guest as well . Instantly flinging a fresh cloth over the round table under the bronze chandelier , though it already had a table cloth on it , he pushed up velvet chairs , and came to a standstill before Stepan Arkadyevitch with a napkin and a bill of fare in his hands , awaiting his commands . " If you prefer it , your excellency , a private room will be free directly ; Prince Golistin with a lady . Fresh oysters have come in . " " Ah ! oysters . " Stepan Arkadyevitch became thoughtful . " How if we were to change our program , Levin ? " he said , keeping his finger on the bill of fare . And his face expressed serious hesitation . " Are the oysters good ? Mind now . " " They 're Flensburg , your excellency . We 've no Ostend . " " Flensburg will do , but are they fresh ? " " Only arrived yesterday . " " Well , then , how if we were to begin with oysters , and so change the whole program ? Eh ? " " It 's all the same to me . I should like cabbage soup and porridge better than anything ; but of course there 's nothing like that here . " " Porridge à la Russe , your honor would like ? " said the Tatar , bending down to Levin , like a nurse speaking to a child . " No , joking apart , whatever you choose is sure to be good . I 've been skating , and I 'm hungry . And do n't imagine , " he added , detecting a look of dissatisfaction on Oblonsky 's face , " that I sha n't appreciate your choice . I am fond of good things . " " I should hope so ! After all , it 's one of the pleasures of life , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch . " Well , then , my friend , you give us two—or better say three—dozen oysters , clear soup with vegetables ... " " Printaniere , " prompted the Tatar . But Stepan Arkadyevitch apparently did not care to allow him the satisfaction of giving the French names of the dishes . " With vegetables in it , you know . Then turbot with thick sauce , then ... roast beef ; and mind it 's good . Yes , and capons , perhaps , and then sweets . " The Tatar , recollecting that it was Stepan Arkadyevitch 's way not to call the dishes by the names in the French bill of fare , did not repeat them after him , but could not resist rehearsing the whole menu to himself according to the bill : — " Soupe printanière , turbot , sauce Beaumarchais , poulard à l'estragon , macédoine de fruits ... etc. , " and then instantly , as though worked by springs , laying down one bound bill of fare , he took up another , the list of wines , and submitted it to Stepan Arkadyevitch . " What shall we drink ? " " What you like , only not too much . Champagne , " said Levin . " What ! to start with ? You 're right though , I dare say . Do you like the white seal ? " " Cachet blanc , " prompted the Tatar . " Very well , then , give us that brand with the oysters , and then we 'll see . " " Yes , sir . And what table wine ? " " You can give us Nuits . Oh , no , better the classic Chablis . " " Yes , sir . And your cheese , your excellency ? " " Oh , yes , Parmesan . Or would you like another ? " " No , it 's all the same to me , " said Levin , unable to suppress a smile . And the Tatar ran off with flying coat-tails , and in five minutes darted in with a dish of opened oysters on mother-of-pearl shells , and a bottle between his fingers . Stepan Arkadyevitch crushed the starchy napkin , tucked it into his waistcoat , and settling his arms comfortably , started on the oysters . " Not bad , " he said , stripping the oysters from the pearly shell with a silver fork , and swallowing them one after another . " Not bad , " he repeated , turning his dewy , brilliant eyes from Levin to the Tatar . Levin ate the oysters indeed , though white bread and cheese would have pleased him better . But he was admiring Oblonsky . Even the Tatar , uncorking the bottle and pouring the sparkling wine into the delicate glasses , glanced at Stepan Arkadyevitch , and settled his white cravat with a perceptible smile of satisfaction . " You do n't care much for oysters , do you ? " said Stepan Arkadyevitch , emptying his wine glass , " or you 're worried about something . Eh ? " He wanted Levin to be in good spirits . But it was not that Levin was not in good spirits ; he was ill at ease . With what he had in his soul , he felt sore and uncomfortable in the restaurant , in the midst of private rooms where men were dining with ladies , in all this fuss and bustle ; the surroundings of bronzes , looking glasses , gas , and waiters—all of it was offensive to him . He was afraid of sullying what his soul was brimful of . " I ? Yes , I am ; but besides , all this bothers me , " he said . " You ca n't conceive how queer it all seems to a country person like me , as queer as that gentleman 's nails I saw at your place ... " " Yes , I saw how much interested you were in poor Grinevitch 's nails , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch , laughing . " It 's too much for me , " responded Levin . " Do try , now , and put yourself in my place , take the point of view of a country person . We in the country try to bring our hands into such a state as will be most convenient for working with . So we cut our nails ; sometimes we turn up our sleeves . And here people purposely let their nails grow as long as they will , and link on small saucers by way of studs , so that they can do nothing with their hands . " Stepan Arkadyevitch smiled gaily . " Oh , yes , that 's just a sign that he has no need to do coarse work . His work is with the mind ... " " Maybe . But still it 's queer to me , just as at this moment it seems queer to me that we country folks try to get our meals over as soon as we can , so as to be ready for our work , while here are we trying to drag out our meal as long as possible , and with that object eating oysters ... " " Why , of course , " objected Stepan Arkadyevitch . " But that 's just the aim of civilization—to make everything a source of enjoyment . " " Well , if that 's its aim , I 'd rather be a savage . " " And so you are a savage . All you Levins are savages . " Levin sighed . He remembered his brother Nikolay , and felt ashamed and sore , and he scowled ; but Oblonsky began speaking of a subject which at once drew his attention . " Oh , I say , are you going tonight to our people , the Shtcherbatskys ' , I mean ? " he said , his eyes sparkling significantly as he pushed away the empty rough shells , and drew the cheese towards him . " Yes , I shall certainly go , " replied Levin ; " though I fancied the princess was not very warm in her invitation . " " What nonsense ! That 's her manner ... . Come , boy , the soup ! ... . That 's her manner—grande dame , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch . " I 'm coming , too , but I have to go to the Countess Bonina 's rehearsal . Come , is n't it true that you 're a savage ? How do you explain the sudden way in which you vanished from Moscow ? The Shtcherbatskys were continually asking me about you , as though I ought to know . The only thing I know is that you always do what no one else does . " " Yes , " said Levin , slowly and with emotion , " you 're right . I am a savage . Only , my savageness is not in having gone away , but in coming now . Now I have come ... " " Oh , what a lucky fellow you are ! " broke in Stepan Arkadyevitch , looking into Levin 's eyes . " Why ? " " I know a gallant steed by tokens sure , And by his eyes I know a youth in love , " declaimed Stepan Arkadyevitch . " Everything is before you . " " Why , is it over for you already ? " " No ; not over exactly , but the future is yours , and the present is mine , and the present—well , it 's not all that it might be . " " How so ? " " Oh , things go wrong . But I do n't want to talk of myself , and besides I ca n't explain it all , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch . " Well , why have you come to Moscow , then ? ... . Hi ! take away ! " he called to the Tatar . " You guess ? " responded Levin , his eyes like deep wells of light fixed on Stepan Arkadyevitch . " I guess , but I ca n't be the first to talk about it . You can see by that whether I guess right or wrong , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch , gazing at Levin with a subtle smile . " Well , and what have you to say to me ? " said Levin in a quivering voice , feeling that all the muscles of his face were quivering too . " How do you look at the question ? " Stepan Arkadyevitch slowly emptied his glass of Chablis , never taking his eyes off Levin . " I ? " said Stepan Arkadyevitch , " there 's nothing I desire so much as that—nothing ! It would be the best thing that could be . " " But you 're not making a mistake ? You know what we 're speaking of ? " said Levin , piercing him with his eyes . " You think it 's possible ? " " I think it 's possible . Why not possible ? " " No ! do you really think it 's possible ? No , tell me all you think ! Oh , but if ... if refusal 's in store for me ! ... Indeed I feel sure ... " " Why should you think that ? " said Stepan Arkadyevitch , smiling at his excitement . " It seems so to me sometimes . That will be awful for me , and for her too . " " Oh , well , anyway there 's nothing awful in it for a girl . Every girl 's proud of an offer . " " Yes , every girl , but not she . " Stepan Arkadyevitch smiled . He so well knew that feeling of Levin 's , that for him all the girls in the world were divided into two classes : one class—all the girls in the world except her , and those girls with all sorts of human weaknesses , and very ordinary girls : the other class—she alone , having no weaknesses of any sort and higher than all humanity . " Stay , take some sauce , " he said , holding back Levin 's hand as it pushed away the sauce . Levin obediently helped himself to sauce , but would not let Stepan Arkadyevitch go on with his dinner . " No , stop a minute , stop a minute , " he said . " You must understand that it 's a question of life and death for me . I have never spoken to any one of this . And there 's no one I could speak of it to , except you . You know we 're utterly unlike each other , different tastes and views and everything ; but I know you 're fond of me and understand me , and that 's why I like you awfully . But for God 's sake , be quite straightforward with me . " " I tell you what I think , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch , smiling . " But I 'll say more : my wife is a wonderful woman ... " Stepan Arkadyevitch sighed , remembering his position with his wife , and , after a moment 's silence , resumed—"She has a gift of foreseeing things . She sees right through people ; but that 's not all ; she knows what will come to pass , especially in the way of marriages . She foretold , for instance , that Princess Shahovskaya would marry Brenteln . No one would believe it , but it came to pass . And she 's on your side . " " How do you mean ? " " It 's not only that she likes you—she says that Kitty is certain to be your wife . " At these words Levin 's face suddenly lighted up with a smile , a smile not far from tears of emotion . " She says that ! " cried Levin . " I always said she was exquisite , your wife . There , that 's enough , enough said about it , " he said , getting up from his seat . " All right , but do sit down . " But Levin could not sit down . He walked with his firm tread twice up and down the little cage of a room , blinked his eyelids that his tears might not fall , and only then sat down to the table . " You must understand , " said he , " it 's not love . I 've been in love , but it 's not that . It 's not my feeling , but a sort of force outside me has taken possession of me . I went away , you see , because I made up my mind that it could never be , you understand , as a happiness that does not come on earth ; but I 've struggled with myself , I see there 's no living without it . And it must be settled . " " What did you go away for ? " " Ah , stop a minute ! Ah , the thoughts that come crowding on one ! The questions one must ask oneself ! Listen . You ca n't imagine what you 've done for me by what you said . I 'm so happy that I 've become positively hateful ; I 've forgotten everything . I heard today that my brother Nikolay ... you know , he 's here ... I had even forgotten him . It seems to me that he 's happy too . It 's a sort of madness . But one thing 's awful ... . Here , you 've been married , you know the feeling ... it 's awful that we—old—with a past ... not of love , but of sins ... are brought all at once so near to a creature pure and innocent ; it 's loathsome , and that 's why one ca n't help feeling oneself unworthy . " " Oh , well , you 've not many sins on your conscience . " " Alas ! all the same , " said Levin , " when with loathing I go over my life , I shudder and curse and bitterly regret it ... . Yes . " " What would you have ? The world 's made so , " said Stepan Arkadyevitch . " The one comfort is like that prayer , which I always liked : 'Forgive me not according to my unworthiness , but according to Thy lovingkindness . ' That 's the only way she can forgive me . " |